i was born a porn star she said
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Boobs speak an international language.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
