I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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