shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
