we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
that is very illegal...i love you.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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