smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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