i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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