loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Alive.
So much puke
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
