Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
