Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
