Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
