did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
