yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
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