Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
