"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
