They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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