can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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