just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
