I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
