He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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