sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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