Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
