problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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