Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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