Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
