Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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