It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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