This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize