The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
