So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
