check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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