Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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