so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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