lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
you will always have a special place in my vag
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
