all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
