Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
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Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
He shit in the fireplace
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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