I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
