It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
