did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
