i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
We got so high we made milksteak
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
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