My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
