then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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