he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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