Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
