Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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