And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
as a side note pls kill me
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
