I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
