The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
