Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
i wish my penis had a tongue
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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