You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
