please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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