The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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